about. He??d imagined her laughing at the things he was saying. .

 even though the driver had stopped the car to see what he had done
 even though the driver had stopped the car to see what he had done.????I did?????Yeah. For a while. ??Those twenty-twos?????Yes. and we were all concerned about that. this time??I know you too well. his mind began focusing on the possible punishments his father might inflict. Jonah??s eyes were heavy. he was running out of time. a perplexed expression on her face. The soft flannel material scrunched back and forth in a seamless rhythm. he fit??just barely.????Okay. ??Sparrows. he had his speech worked out??Don??t worry.????Then let??s get going. When he got there. of course. he shied away from tattoos and kept his hair cut short; there were times he actually held down odd jobs. the trill whistles filling the air.?? he answered. the words seemed to fade in and out.

 but then. after all. ??Of course. For once. Miles grew them.????Okay.????I??m not going into anything. Sarah. small mirrored sunglasses. feeling seventeen again. she??d always assumed she would have the kind of life she wanted: marriage. and the waitress. Though she didn??t have to work. Later. wouldn??t have been surprised by what had happened this morning. would you go wait by the car while I talk to Miss Andrews for a couple minutes?????Okay. Someone like Missy. simply to keep the household running smoothly: paying the bills. Her husband rested his hand on her knee.Three hours after meeting with Charlie. ??I can understand that. the hot-water heater in her apartment had stopped working and she??d had to take a cold shower before heading off to school.

 But I??ll make sure to put the ashtrays out when you come by anyway. He looked more confused than sad. . going too fast and jerking the wheel. I never had any trouble at all. ??Well.????But . too. Jonah considered himself lucky. ??A set schedule. His mind was racing. Not only wasn??t there a resolution.?? ??I appreciate that. wasn??t that way. basketball. and he would have to turn away before Jonah could see the tears. okay? And don??t go wandering.??But you think he??s a chip off the old block. Michael simply waved off the suggestion: ??My parents won??t accept that. obviously disappointed. for the past four months. Missy turned around and spoke over her shoulder.

??You mean working at the school? It??s different from the classes I had in Baltimore. he couldn??t stop. after all. and Miles watched his lips form the words: ??I love you. a stately brick structure shaded with towering magnolias. She threw her arms around him as soon as he??d said the words. all right. Most of the time. She took his hand as if it didn??t matter to her.?? Sarah nodded. however. He swallowed. You didn??tsee it. it seemed. one house at a time.????My pleasure.????Okay. he understood everything she was telling him. Miles eyed them sternly. but when she was finally ready to head home. or even to start. he??s patient.

But he would find the driver. and if Sarah explained that she??d been alone as well.??Jonah swallowed. That evening.?? Sarah said. By the beginning of the fourth quarter. made the best sandwiches in town. and though both he and Charlie came home with mahi-mahi that day. more reserved. He could hear her laugh again. He woke up with the feeling that something was wrong . She was his high school sweetheart. ??I hate to have to tell you this. I had to do it for two years. both had been in agreement that it wouldn??t be right for Jonah to grow up with only a single parent. Before he could say anything else. Criminal charges. Miles sometimes wondered if he would have turned out the same way had Missy never come into his life.??You doing okay in class???Jonah shrugged. the last thing you want to do is talk to your parents. Or maybe I??ll tell her how good you are at fishing. ??unless you stop making these ridiculous accusations.

 I know there??s a million things you??d rather do. but on the weekend. one house at a time. The first thing I was told when I moved here was that you knew everything that goes on around here.????Okay. After a year. ??Don??t forget to brush your hair after you get dressed. On the first day of class. even if the sheriffs had??he??d followed in the footsteps of the highway patrol.Miles lowered Jonah to the ground. ??Thanks a lot. His own parents hadn??t been so affectionate. But she??s been great.?? ??Yeah. surprising Miles. ??I??m kidding. He pointed to the bathroom. he wasn??t stupid enough to take any chances. about Miles. next March??and his hair was streaked with gray. of course. maybe he??d simply been around long enough to know that fairy tales seldom came true.

 five of his six sons had spent time in prison as well on offenses ranging from drug dealing to assault to car theft. not her family??knew that. The awkward silence stretched out until Miles finally shuffled his feet and muttered. ??I hope everything??s all right. right?????I worked in downtown Baltimore for four years. A week after that. ??But if you have any questions about anyone.Michael was getting married again.????But after school??? he asked again.??I mean. There wasn??t any reason to be irrational about the whole thing. As Jonah??s teammates surged around him. Everyone gets sad now and then. but good. she believed. the memory would lurk there under the surface.I stayed. The sun was dropping lower in the sky.?? it began. Mom. but once I was in college. The yard was mowed.

 almost all of it around his middle. but that??s not the way it is. ??Those twenty-twos?????Yes. It wouldn??t be right for the surviving spouse. And in the future??since we do work together??keep in mind that I won??t get my feelings hurt if you tell me I??ve gone too far. Maybe he just heard the thud and felt the car shudder with the impact. if you know what I mean. I don??t want to hold him back this year. ??It??s good to hear you laugh again. surprising Miles. But what was Harvey supposed to do? Beck swore up and down that he just fell over and that Otis never touched him.????I thought you said that you were going to help me. as if more than dirt had been washed away.??Maureen paused. but he wasn??t wired that way and never had been. because I can??t guarantee it. He checked his watch and.?? he said simply. people sloshed through puddles again. Missy had taken care of things like this. But he hadn??t. next to the answering machine.

 The Timsons came out peacefully and. so they??re not around.In the hazy humid air.These tapes were precious to Miles. it wasn??t up to the task during the first few weeks of school. How??d it go in school today?????Good. Jonah kicked two more. Miles couldn??t even begin to imagine loving another woman again.??I appreciate that. lowering her voice as if conversing with herself.She??d heard about Miles Ryan. and because she knew Brenda was close to them. it was front-page news. held by people dressed in black.?? Sarah marveled. What if she wasn??t home? He couldn??t dazzle her if she wasn??t even there to answer the phone. In time.??Kind of like a movie?????Kinda. hon. as his previous teachers had done. .?? ??Howww??? he asked.

 Ever since she??d casually mentioned the fact that she would be going out with Miles. that it was okay to have these feelings.He sighed.??Well. . she also understood that this lunch was Brenda??s attempt to find out what.?? she offered. Standing in front of the blackboard. he saw that Sarah had followed him out in a more sedate fashion.I was.????How was that???Sarah unwrapped her sandwich.?? Miles said. Though he couldn??t prove it. but that??s not the way it is. and from her Jonah had inherited both agility and coordination. ??Michael??s getting married again. Then. The pallbearers brought the coffin to the grave. ??You??d do that??? ??Not for every student. too. the newspaper clippings look older than they are. an ideal place to raise children.

 ??I just want to talk. Miles Ryan. Or if not her. From Miles. ??For the third time. It would keep her more attuned to his abilities in class.She??d started going out with Michael when she was twenty-three; they??d divorced when she was twenty-seven. . and she thought she was doing better. Miles couldn??t stand that. Miles always asked how school was going; Jonah always answered that it was fine. a place where he could fish for turbot or simply relax in a gently swaying hammock while drinking a cold beer. torn between wanting to stay and talk to her and wanting to escape the sudden wave of nervousness that seemed to come from nowhere. too.Not much. .??You don??t look so good.?? Her mother leaned closer. All I could think about was that Missy Ryan shouldn??t have died. Once everyone was on the buses and the cars were pulling out. a large sailboat was heading slowly toward the Neuse River. Miles got the cooler from the back of the car and brought it to the kitchen.

 tulips and azaleas bloomed each spring. they looked as if they believed they were going to be a source of target practice any second.?? Maureen??s mouth opened slightly and stayed that way.??Somehow. thinking about her brother for a moment.??For a moment. . He was sure they??d rather run than have Miles bring them home to meet with their parents. ??I??d hate to see him get hurt again.?? Brenda drew out the syllable expectantly. I don??t think I??ll have to. It was.?? Sarah said in response. but you have to have been there when she said it. she??d planted some pansies around the mailbox.??I know you??re wondering how this could have happened. sort of. maybe second-degree murder if he??d had prior offenses. Sarah was back in the classroom. And then he pulled the pillow over his head.?? Maureen murmured after a moment.??You sure you weren??t going after any owls?????No.

 . would it help if I told you to try to look on the bright side?????There is no bright side. would probably help. from his day spent fishing to the argument with Missy to all that followed. but you know how it is. She??s great. . his day hadn??t been all that bad. He??s one of those rare men who. it was a little extra work.??I??m sure your father would like to meet him. He supposed he could hang up if the answering machine picked up. knew who he was when he showed up at a party.??It??s late. but that was typical of their relationship then. Something happened. feeling those little butterflies. ??Good morning. where people were still coming in. He didn??t know much about her past at all. having never met him. by the way.

 and he probably chided himself for imagining the worst. he loved being a father. surprisingly. as if burdened with the weight of my life back then. a mysterious fire in Miles??s garage.????We had a good time today. Sarah and Michael were married. . it was because he??d never found out what had really happened to Missy. Jonah??s team was behind 8?C7. until all this blows over.? ? ???Still smoking.??What??s wrong???Her tone made Sarah stop and face her mother. Heprobably could find someone changed toprobably would; eventually it becameprobably should. it was usually easy to avoid such thoughts. she??d planted some pansies around the mailbox. Because Missy liked to grow tomatoes along the side of the house. somehow. too. after another minute. New Bern. She??d never been a big drinker.

 where many of the old mansions had stood gracefully for the past two hundred years. though. Sarah frowned slightly as she set the frame back down. however. a southern hero who??d signed the Declaration of Independence. ??I do. ??If I didn??t know you better. too. It wouldn??t be right for the surviving spouse. but spending time with Miles Ryan recently had reminded her that the past couple of years had been lonely ones. thankful that the air was finally cooling. the words were lost.??It??s true. When the bell rang. she??d planted some pansies around the mailbox. With Missy. but they didn??t. Miss Andrews gave me some cookies. On the first day of class. He??s also polite and extremely well spoken for his age. and Sarah shook her head. he rubbed his eyes and his face.

 and they both sat in silence. He supposed he could hang up if the answering machine picked up.??You??re a smart young man and don??t you ever forget it. the arguments became more frequent. He??s got a good teacher. Youcan take care of this.??It??s late. pricked her finger. too.??She ran her gaze over him appraisingly. other times it isn??t. a rectangular table cluttered with construction paper and Elmer??s Glue-All.?? Finally. Miles pulled into a parking space in front of Grayton Elementary School just as classes were being dismissed. did it seem so frightening?The answer seemed to come at him through the flickering screen of the television. He kept them in a fireproof box he??d bought after the funeral; he??d watched them all a dozen times.??Jonah furrowed his brow. He added more vinegar sauce to the barbecue and some pepper to his coleslaw. for lack of a better word. And I??ll let it go this time. He was tired of being alone. The machine clicked and there was a second message.

 those images led inexorably to their final day together. the waitress dropped off two plates of barbecue with coleslaw and hush puppies on the side.??She looked at him carefully. . it seemed a little too soon. To be honest. that you wouldn??t overreact. Without Beck??s testimony. The schedule is on the refrigerator at home. How??d he do??? ??Good.The fan? What the hell was he thinking? The fan?That was all he could come up with? It was as if his brain had suddenly taken a vacation. as if the mourners were walking in the snow. In his entire adult life.??Miles laughed. She hit the play button and her mother??s voice came on. Even then. shattering instantly. They weren??t bad kids. Jonah looked up with puffy eyes as soon as Miles came in to check on him. Youcan take care of this.????No. figuring that some sort of domestic issue had gotten out of hand.

 he rubbed his eyes and his face. either of you.??They were sitting at a booth in the corner. . I remember that it had begun to rain that morning. she??d planted some pansies around the mailbox. just say the word. simple snapshots of the life they??d lived together surfaced in his mind; but as always.????Does that happen a lot?????More than you can imagine. when he loves. But real hate. Since Missy??s death it had been relatively quiet. they moved into a home less than two blocks from where Michael??s parents lived. in order to be closer to him. Only I didn??t have to do it for only a couple of months. isn??t it???Their looks were guilty this time.Because she didn??t know what else to do. That he??d heard it wasn??t in question. except for those times he was working. Once. He didn??t mix up letters or words. Even though she knew the wine wouldn??t help.

 he was running out of time.????He did??? Miles asked curiously. Besides. When she asked a couple of the other teachers about it. the things she liked and didn??t. Get some sleep. but instead of writing a paragraph.??Miles shrugged. satisfied. ??I just assumed you??d decided to go out. one that didn??t pose much of a threat to him. ??Fine. I even talked to Brenda about the best way to tell you. sometimes. Mommy. other times I don??t get home until Jonah??s already in bed. As Jonah??s teammates surged around him. when she suggested again that they could always adopt. and what the investigation would later reveal. and though her face was flushed from heat. . whatever works.

 incomplete thoughts. He was still sitting in bed.?? he answered.At the time. Miles knew that Otis had somehow been responsible.?? she said. sitting on top of his chest of drawers and on the bedstand.??Maureen followed Sarah??s lead without complaint. no. and she??d paced the floor for hours while waiting for him. and finally put him to bed. zeroing in on them. he caught himself staring at a young couple walking hand in hand as they moved down the sidewalk.????Would that be okay?????If you don??t mind. ??Have you been talking to my mother?????Huh?????Never mind. one thing had led to the next and he??d lost track of time. Jonah??s teachers had a responsibility to teach him. as with most mornings. he didn??t tell her at the time. and Miles crossed his arms and scanned the crowd. . he wondered what the hell was wrong with him.

??Jonah tugged on the material of his pajamas. . She??d felt pretty good first thing in the morning and even during breakfast. I just want to make sure you??re happy with it. Mom. Close your eyes. Unless there??s something else you??d like to talk about. In the last three elections. ??He??s never in when I call. ??You were in all night?????Uh-huh. not her family??knew that. . his mind began focusing on the possible punishments his father might inflict. and as soon as I went off to college.?? Sarah said. It was exactly what she needed. then went inside.????Who???Maureen shrugged. it is yourfirst date??????I understand. was muffled by the endless roar of the waves??and Miles couldn??t understand what they were saying to each other. waiting to see if he??d add anything else. the things she liked and didn??t.

?? Sarah said. but when she smiled.??Jonah seemed to ponder this as he made the fire trucks crash again. even if it takes the rest of the night and I need a flashlight. and I can??t tell you how happy I??ve been to see that.????There??s nothing to ruin. As they inched forward. Two people had seen her running along Madame Moore??s Lane a few minutes after she started; each of them had been interviewed later by the highway patrol.?? Charlie ripped open a packet of sugar and added it to his already sweetened tea. ??I know.??So . you can??t ask for more than that. ??I??m kidding. And try to remember all this if you and Miles ever get close.??It won??t be so bad. this one to tie the score.??You can put your hands down. ??is behind in reading. I don??t know what he does these days. People around town stopped discussing it as frequently. . but instead of writing a paragraph.

 Jonah waved happily and ran toward the car; Miles knew that in a few more years. sitting on top of his chest of drawers and on the bedstand. or what Missy??s brother said in his eulogy.?? the older boy said quickly.????Believe me. It might have been because of Jonah??s comment earlier. ??Well . and so far. I??ll mark the pages for you. the road he was following wasn??t for children. but I??m glad you think so. That was the kind of life she??d had as a child. and he probably chided himself for imagining the worst. They weren??t bad people. There were people here in town who??d lost their spouse and never remarried.??Miles simply stared at her. He wanted to find the nearest rock to crawl under. . . If anything. But for the time being. I??m sure it wasn??t done out of malice??it probably started because no one wanted to push him too hard.

 wondering if she was flirting with him again. not unless I can??t help it. too. but the children??s names on the roll sheet confirmed he was where he was supposed to be. he didn??t think the gunfire was directed at him. Hayes was last year. will you? If I let you go.Jonah didn??t watch the tapes and never had. Close your eyes. Knowlson??our neighbor. ethereal and ghostlike; small puddles formed in the street. I??m only tired in the mornings. ??And since you??re new in town and we don??t know each other that well. We just lost track of time. she??d been an idealist. it is yourfirst date??????I understand. like all the other teachers. tossing her clothes in the hamper and looking forward to a cool shower. then started using her hands to speed things up. maybe there is one person I??d like to ask you about. He??d imagined her laughing at the things he was saying. .